Top 5 Industrial Bands of All Time

So, you think you know industrial, huh? I bet whenever somebody asks you, "Who are the best bands in industrial?" you go ahead and say shit such as Skinny Puppy, Front 242, Nitzer Ebb, yada yada yada. Yeah, you're fucking wrong. We here at Brutal Resonance are going to set the record straight and tell you who the best industrial bands are in the entire worldwide scene. Get prepared, Buttercup, and prepare to have your mind fucking blown cause this shit is about to get wicked. 


05. Eisenfunk : Nothing really needs to be said here in regards to this triple threat. Eisenfunk has written some of the greatest industrial songs of all time. Their legendary songs include "Pong", "Pong", and we can never and will never forget about their best song ever "Pong". This is the song that gets everyone into industrial and if you say it didn't then you're probably a fucking liar and need to get out of the scene and go listen to something else. 


04. Scooter : Was this really a question? Scooter is a techno genius but I mean if you're drunk enough and say the word techno over and over eventually the word industrial will come out of your mouth because it practically means the same thing. I mean they wear suits. Everyone likes those. That's so industrial. Scooter is so industrial. It's uncanny. 


03. The Construction Site Down the Road From my House : Every single edgy industrial band on the planet anymore thinks it's a fucking contest to be the most noisiest, to be the one who uses the most field samples. But tell you what motherfucker, nothing is going to get as raw or noisey as the construction site right down the road from my house. Cranes, jackhammers, grinding steel, people falling to their death; it's all there. It's unique. It's lively. It's the best noise I have ever heard in my life. Go there with no hard hat on as well to really get into that industrial mood. It's the best. 


02. Ed Sheeran : Basically, let's put it like this. Sheeran's music has been dominating most of the charts for some time now. It seems as if his music is the only music people are listening to according to everyone in the world, so we might as well group every single genre of music together. So, there is no more rap, rock, or anything else. There is only Ed Sheeran. And since he's so high and mighty, we might as well also group industrial under there. Number two is Ed Sheeran. Don't argue with me. I know industrial. 


01. Nobody : That's right, nobody is the number one industrial musician of all time. You know why? Because no one is good enough to take this spot. The most underground thing to do is say that the music you listen to isn't good but you love it anyway cause you're weird and dark and mysterious. So there's that. Don't ever let anyone know you listen to industrial. Keep it a secret. And if someone starts getting into the music make sure you're snotty and throw a bunch of facts at them and tell them they know jack shit. 

And that's our definitive list of the greatest industrial bands in the world. Do you disagree with us? Yeah? Well we don't care and you're wrong cause we know more about industrial then you ever will. Goodbye.